This morning I was going through Edward’s backpack to get it ready for school. In it I found a slip of paper from Friday. I could see that it was note even as I reached for it. Uh oh, what trouble has Eddie gotten into now?

Dear, mom and dad
I am srooy I said the word drunk in school. I won’t say it again.
from
Edward

I stood in the kitchen, note in hand, trying to wrap my head around it. He’s sorry he said…. drunk? For this he’s being forced to write an apology and to promise never to utter such a forbidden, dangerous, provocative word within the hallowed halls of learning ever again?

Edward doesn’t recall why he said drunk (ooo, there, I wrote it again!) or to whom. I’m curious, but unless he was taunting another kid (he wasn’t) or talking about how s***faced he was going to get over the weekend (har), the context doesn’t matter so much. Even then, it’s not the word that’s dangerous but the intent and actions behind it — teasing and alcohol abuse are serious issues. But merely saying the word?

I am to sign the note and have Edward return it to his teacher. The note is sitting next to me on the desk. I’m trying to figure out what to say to her. As for Edward, we talked briefly during the hubbub of morning rush hour, but we’ll talk again. I want him to respect the rules and his teacher. I don’t try to undermine that. Yet, I also want my child to respect his own mind and his own sense of right and wrong.

It’s not a big deal, but when you’re nine years old and you’re trying to figure out where and how you fit in the larger world, and you are still mostly looking to your parents and teachers for guidance, it is a big deal.

Geez. Drunk in third grade. I thought I’d have until his junior year to deal with that.