WhirlyQ

I have been following the amazing trip of Jen and family as they journey cross country from west to east and back again. I am reminded of our own long, incredible journey last summer… the days in the minivan, the unloading and reloading at hotels along the way, the weeks with extended family… it was fantastic and I still can’t quite believe we pulled it off.

Another reason I like Jen’s blog is because she makes me feel, on my worst days, normal. I know she gets it. And she too has grappled with the whole concept of relocation and house woes. And there is something about the contrast of her being originally from Massachusetts and flirting at times with the idea of returning and me being a Massachusetts non-native resident who wants nothing more than to leave that is interesting.

So when I read this post, I was struck with the sense that Jen should be living my life. I suddenly could see my life through her eyes. It only underscored something I have felt for a long time, for decades really. That no matter how long I live here, no matter how connected I am and how many memories New England, my town, my house hold for me, there is and always will be a barrier between this place and my heart. I can appreciate it. I have tender feelings for it. I will miss it. BUT we don’t belong together. This place - this life - deserves someone who can truly give her heart and soul to it. Who loves it in ways I never will.

This place deserves someone who loves the Cape and Vineyard.
Who loves the Sox and Pats.
Who relishes clam shacks and lobstah.
Who finds the chilly waters off the Maine coast refreshing.

Most of all, this place deserves someone who wants to be here.

And that someone just isn’t me.

Now I am presuming things about Jen, not really knowing her or where her heart lies. I don’t know if she would really want to move back here, leave her beach and San Diego sunshine. I am projecting, of course. But the feeling of me being the wrong person in the right place resonates. My life, my future memories, live elsewhere, west of Mississippi. Of that I am utterly certain.

So Jen, if you and Charlie are interested in a 155-year old, fully renovated farmhouse and huge barn on several acres in a lovely, historic, charming semi-rural town with open fields and apple orchards and great schools and direct access to Boston by road or rail, let me know. (Seriously.) We’re ready to hand over the reins.

p.s. Did I mention we’re close to Kimball’s? The big one? With the bumper boats and the mini-golf and the country store? AND the ice cream?